Good morning.
This is my 2nd attempt of writing my journal today.
No glitches this time, but I didn't like the way my journal sounded when I read it back.
I had already posted it, but chose to delete it. It was way too negative. Let's keep a positive attitude, shall we?
I'm gonna stick to the same topics, so there really won't be much changed, just the wording of a lot of things.
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I gained weight today, more than two kilos! I gotta say, this was quite a surprise, as I did good yesterday. I stayed within RDI, I even had a little left.
My guess is that I probably had more salt than I think, I had quite large portions of food, and the carb numbers WERE kinda high.
Still, I did not expect this.
It's okay though. And if it wasn't, then there would be nothing I could do to change that number here and now anyways. Right?
What bothers me more is the fact that I LET IT BOTHER ME. I hope this makes sense.
I know that the fluctuations will be there. I know that I will lose and gain the same kilos over and over, and that is essentially what maintenance of weight is. There is no set point that I will just be at. It will always be over, then under, then over, etc.
So many factors will affect this. What did I eat, salt, carbs, am I hydrated enough, when did I last work out?
Obviously, it will fluctuate.
I think I need to give that whole thought a rest. It's making my head spin today. LOL.
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Here is an interesting observation, though...
As I have written a little about recently, it seems that when have have my fluctuations, my scale claims that it sits in muscle tissue, and makes it look like I grew muscles - lots of them - overnight, just to lose them again the day after.
Well, this time is no different - except for the fact that I have seemingly grown MORE muscle than I gained weight. This is a first. I gained 2.1 kilo weight, but I gained 2.7 kilos of muscle. That's quite a big difference, I think.
Obviously I didn't gain a pound of "real" muscle overnight. I might be pushing hard at the gym, but nothing will me one grow muscle that fast. :)
I think it just goes with the territory of weighing in daily and nerding the numbers that there will be strange recordings like this.
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I think that I need to focus on a few other points instead of simply losing weight and following that whole race.
I have been pointering quite a bit over the future of tracking everything. What is the better thing to do?
I've spent quite a lot of journals talking about reaching my old goals - first it was 77 kilos, then it got more ambitious and became 76, then I realized that it just won't ever happen due to me gaining quite a bit of muscle, and I set the number to 80 kilos. Today I am 83.6 kilos, and it's after a large fluctuation. It's not like it's a bad number.
Bodyfat % is good, at 9%. It's higher than what it has been at other times, but let's not forget that this was on a different scale.
Maybe I should consider doing a check-in on the gym scale, which has my recordings from the last half year?
I will do that as soon as I can get it to fit into my plans. I can't sleep, workout, eat or drink for three hours prior to it, and I want it to be done in the morning, so I need to make sure to prep for it. It can't be today, though I would have liked to.
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The scale that the gym has is the "brother" to my new Über Smart Smartscale. They should record things fairly similar.
I'm not sure just how much those no-sleep, food, drink, workout rules affect things. I can understand that they are a condition for as accurate readings as possible, but still...
I just looked up the numbers from the gym online, and they do show some interesting things to compare with today's numbers.
1. My bodyfat percentage is within ONE percent variation from all the measurements at the gym and today's weigh-in. Considering that today's weigh-in is a HIGH weigh-in, and the gym ones are usually low, I think it's fair to compare to yesterday's much lower weigh-in. Compared to this, I am these days about ONE percent higher still, so 2% higher in bodyfat. Not really an issue, I think. However, it's something I think I need to fix. I don't wont things to slide.
2. Muscle mass is generally at least 2+ kilos higher today. This is GREAT!
So, I may have a little more bodyfat, but I definitely have much more muscle. This is great!
It's nice to see that things are really okay, when things are getting a little frustrating.
Anyways, I was about to talk a litte more about my goals. I tend to keep chasing those weight numbers. I realize more and more that at the level where I am at, the actual weight is unimportant.
I think I am starting to see that:
Weight is only the sum of the total weight of muscle, fat, water, bones, food processing and what-have-you.
This far along in the weight loss game, it's really not a number that I can use all that much.
Instead, there are two numbers that are MUCH MORE interesting:
Bodyfat percentage and muscle weight.
These are the numbers that I need to focus on. These are the numbers that I need to impact, though exercise and diet. These are the numbers that will be relevant for the future.
This doesn't change my approach to things. It doesn't change the fact that I should count my calories, that I should workout the way I do, that I should not eat all that candy.
But if I can TRULY get into my head that these numbers - NOT the weight number - are the important ones, then I will mentally relax and make this a lot more pleasant for myself. Since it's a life long journey, there is no point in making it a tough one, if it isn't needed, right?
It's all about mindset.
Of course, the fluctuations in weight will also affect the readings in muscle and fat. Water fluctuations seems to settle into the muscle tissue - at least this is what I have concluded, and please correct me if I'm wrong - and thus the fluctuations will still be there. They will be equally frustrating, probably. But I hope they will be different, still.
I am considering to maybe move my spreadsheet from work to my home computer, so I can update it here before I journal. This way, I can simply use it as a guide to measure success over a longer course than the day-to-day thing I tend to do.
I don't want to stop weighing in daily. It keeps me focused on my goals, and it keeps me on my toes. I feel that if I only weigh in weekly then I can slip even easier than what I do already. I don't think this will ever be an option.
But if I can simply record my weight here (and in my food diary), and mentally go with the more average numbers, then I think things will be easier.
This, of course, also puts in another thing to deal with. My average weight IS climbing, but very very slow. Muslce is also climing, but so is fat percentage. Wait, did I write this already, or was that in my first attempt of journaling? I'm not sure.
Anyways, it IS climing.
I need to man up an do a little better on my diet. More smart choices, less junk.
Today is not the day, though, and probably not this weekend. We were supposed to have a visitor all weekend. Well, it turns out that there was a misunderstanding, and she won't be here until next week.
This gives me a full weekend with absolutely no plans. No band rehearsal, no guests, no work. Nothing. I like that. :)
It also gives me a lot of down time at home. It gives me trouble.
Right now, I don't really care.
It might cause me to make less smart food choices here and there, and if that happens, so be it. I think I can use a weekend with less focus, as a conscious choice, with me not beating myself up about it afterwards.
I have 2½ months to get things to where I want them (which, essentially, is where I already am), so a weekend off won't hurt anything. I know how to get to my goals on time - I've done it so many times over the last few years.
I am prefectly content with having a bodyfat% of 9 or 10. I have zero issue with this. It's all good. I know that it's good with the surgeons too, as this is what I had when they saw me last. I was at 8.8 according to the gym scale.
So, I'll wing it a little more this weekend, then be on track Monday. I will NOT go all nuts and just eat anything and everything in sight, but I want to mentally relax. Food has been too much of a focus for me lately.
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So, if I was to implement new plans today, they would simply be to stop looking at how much I weigh, but focus more - on the AVERAGE bodyfat% and muscle weight. Today's numbers aren't important other than in the bigger picture of averages.
I can't access the file from home, so I can't really see where my average is, but I think I remember it staying 83 kilos as my average weight. It's been climbing a little from 81 or 82 over the last three months or so, but that fits fine with muscle gain, I think. Maybe a little more.
Considering that I have had the new scale for less than a week, it's too early to really say anything about averages on muscle and fat. I am tracking it though, and in a few weeks I can make some conclusions and run some statistics.
Until then - do good, work hard. Enjoy like.
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Today, I'm thankful for: - Mentally reorganizing things, and realizing what is important and what is not. - Wife. I love her so. - LONG WEEKEND! - Morning coffee. - Absolutely no plans for days!
I feel like today's journal is a jumbled mess. I hope you can make sense of it.
Life is good!
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