Good morning!
Once again, THANK YOU for all your supporting comments. I truly appreciate them.
I still can't muster up too much energy, but I'm here, I'm doing well, I'm getting back in shape and I'm inching my way back to the weight I want.
I try to read journals, but it all seem so overwhelming these days. I apologize.
Maybe this is an idea... if you are reading this, would you be a dear and put a comment, letting me know a little about how YOU are doing?
I'm trying to get some replies to inbox messages out too. I'll get there. :)
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I slept reasonably well. Still a LOT of interrupted sleep, but better than most nights. I can still tell that I'm way behind on my sleep.
I appreciate all the advice you guys are giving me on sleep, and I am trying some of them - but not much seems to truly do anything. I don't really have problems falling asleep. I have problems afterwards. I wake up constantly, it's all interrupted and messy.
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I did well yesterday.
I hit the gym, and did reasonably good there. I failed on one machine, the toughest one I do, but I know why. I usually start with this one, and yesterday I didn't. I ended with it. I think I was simply too exhausted at that point. Lesson learned.
I went walking, as I always do. Not so much for the burn, but more for the mental relaxation. The weather was super nice, looked like spring, so I really wanted to get out there. I know it was good for me.
Today, I'm gonna walk again. It's not the focused "burn a lot of calories"-kinda walk, but more the "mental relaxation"-type.
I stick to my theory that TOO MUCH cardio isn't all that good. Not for me, anyways. I don't want to spend hours upon hours on it, with just very little results. It's a lot easier to lower the calorie intake then, and save hours of daily work.
It works for me.
Now, don't confuse this with me doing nothing at all. I do plenty. Most days I still reach 10,000+ steps, and I do strength training three times per week. I'm not doing "nothing". I just don't want to walk just to burn calories, so I can eat more.
I might change my view on that later, but for now, I'll pass.
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Somewhere in the community forum, I found a link to an
interesting article about "doing too much cardio". Thank you to Diablo360 for sharing it.
I think they're right on this. We become very efficient at the type of exercises we do, and we start getting less of a benefit from doing them. It makes sense in my head.
In the article they are suggesting HIIT exercises instead, as a much more efficient way of doing "cardio". I get that.
I'm trying to find HIIT exercises that I can do at home. It'd be nice to be able to get a good workout in half the time, do it at home when it's cold (and when it's not), and then add my comfortable walk on top as needed/wanted. I'd like that.
The trouble is that I see most HIIT stuff in, say, YouTube videos have a lot of jumping around, lots of bouncing.
I live in an apartment and have people living underneath me.
I can't jump like crazy like that. It'll make so much noise, and have my whole floor bouncing.
I'm not sure how to get around this.
I will find a way sooner or later.
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Right now I wouldn't be able to do too much of this kind of exercise regardless. I'm still troubled by my back.
It's getting better, but it's kinda slow. And still, I am lucky if this just takes a few weeks.
Last time I had back aches like this, they lasted more than 18 months. I don't want to go back to that.
So, I will have to take care of myself for now. I need to do the RIGHT exercises to get better, and avoid the wrong ones.
Fortunately, it doesn't seem like my strength training is affecting my back at all, as long as I practice good form doing it. I can tell immediately whether I've done it right or wrong. If I do wrong, I will be "punished" with a sharp pain. Yesterday at the gym, I had NONE of those. That was major relief.
I don't want to be benched again.
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I did find some yoga exercises that can help stretching and relieve pain in lower backs. I think I'll try that today sometime. Let's see what happens.
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These days, since it's harder for me to get out of the house, it'll be nice to have some good workouts to do. I like the one I used to do, the Extreme Makeover Weightloss Edition workouts, but they are too close to strength training (using body weight) for me to feel comfortable with doing them on my rest days. I think it'll be counter productive.
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My weight? It's still high, but slowly coming down.
I'm not in the 88's, but in the 85's so I shouldn't be complaining, but it's still very high for me. I want to nudge it all down at least 3-5 kilos, get back close to 80 kilos. It'll come fast, I'm sure. It's just a matter of doing right.
I did right yesterday. All foods fit my macros, I was at a calorie deficit of a couple of hundred calories, and mostly had real food.
I did decide to buy a bar of dark chocolate. I made it fit in my nutritional balance, made it fit in my RDI. I felt that I wouldn't have any problems stopping after. I felt safe, and went for it, and it was GREAT. :)
This is the control that I need to have, day after day. And, of course, it's the control that I do NOT have day after day.
Yesterday, it felt right, though. And it worked.
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So, how am I FEELING?
Well, my thoughts are still a mess. There is too much going on inside me.
I see little things that indicate whether I feel good or not. Just little behavioral things. Some are easy to analyze. Stuff like me NOT walking past my work place these days, even if they aren't opening up until hours later. It's not that I don't want to meet my coworkers. I don't want to meet the PLACE, I think. That, and the boss.
There are several other little indicators, but I won't get into them all.
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I have my appointment with the psychologist tomorrow. I'm very curious about it. I don't know much about what to expect, but I am super open minded to it. I picked one that is using a lot of tools that I find intersting. I'm hoping to learn some techniques and ways to handle stress, that I can pick and choose from in the future too. I hope this works out okay.
Of course, first priority is to get me "fixed" here and now. I know these things take time, and I'm willing to put that into it. I need this. Badly.
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Today, I'm thankful for:
- My back hurting less than it did yesterday. Cross your fingers for speedy recovery!
- A nice cup of coffee!
- Wife!
- Getting help.
Have a great day! Life is good!