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ok, so i have "reached my goal weight"....i know i should sound more excited, but i feel more trepidition than accomplishment...perhaps it is the forever reliable tormented inner voice telling me i will fail again and gain weight...i am trying hard to not listen. also i am sick. i am a bad asthmatic that has caught a nasty head/chest cold from one of my lovely 4 children....can't blame just one cause they are all sick! :) so here i am, an emotional run-away train ready to crash into whatever is in front of me...be it my husband, kids, co-workers, etc. taking 80mg of prednisone a day is terrible. i can't smell anything, i am sleeping up at a 40 degree angle at night to breathe, i wake up breathless, i am sweaty (i hate that one the most), my face is puffy and red, and my hands shake. couple all that with my sarcastic bad mood and short temper and I am ready to kill me. the only thing i can taste is the aweful aftertaste of prednisone. i actually swallowed my pride and told my doctor i need ativan if i am going to be on this dose or higher and he agreed (for the sake of me maintaining my marriage). i have only had to take 1/2 tablet twice and i have been on the prednisone since friday....so really not too bad. my husband is barely speaking to me cause i got mad when he turned up the "dinner" music when we were eating dinner too loud. i called him narcissistic and selfish...oops. he just knows to stay away...far away from me. so i appologize ahead of time, to all that read this. usually i am happy-go-lucky....just not today. i am hoping to not have to go into work until 11pm (i took on-call from 7p-11p) in hopes of lying down and resting since i was up half the night on the couch channel surfing because of the insomnia that goes along with taking prednisone. on a good note, my house is sparkily clean, the laundry is done, and dinner is made. sometimes not being able to sit still works to your advantage too...
xxoo
mel
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1102 kcal
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Fett: 72,50g | Eiw: 52,05g | Kohlh: 55,91g.
Frühstück: medium dunkin donuts french vanilla coffee, dunkin donut wake up wrap. Mittagessen: mel's vegetable soup, Atkins Advantage Peanut Butter Granola Bars. Abendessen: parm, CREAMY CAESAR, claussen pickles, kalamata olive, grape tomato, red onion, feta, rainbow pepper, iceberg lettuce. Snacks/Sonstiges: Day Break Strawberry Banana Shake. mehr...
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